So what is up with life?

I mean one day everything is just fine and dandy and the next thing everything has changed before you know and before you can have any input, any say so, try to put a stop to, or try to get a handle on this thing called life. It just makes it's own mind up for us and throws us into a tale spin. So there you find yourself trying to steer your life back into what now seems to be your life as you now have to deal with it...

What The Crap Does that Mean???

Sorry about that... For those of you who might not know, I lost my dad about 2 1/2 months ago. That sucks!!! I have never been through anything like that before in my life and there has been some junk. My dad was in a bad accident many years ago and has had some issues off and on since then but this. Come on. My dad was not feeling well (which was sorta common) so he went to the doctors on a Monday. Instead of them telling us "we need to readjust your meds again" or "you should try this kind of therapy" it was something completely different this time. Something none of us have ever heard. "Boys" (speaking to my brother and myself) not even looking at my dad, the doctor says "your dad has cancer and he has about 2 to 6 weeks to live." What??? What does that mean? Not the bad kind right! Oh, no it's the bad kind. It's called Leukemia. And a bad kind at that. OK so again, What??? The doctor continues to tell us all about it as nicely as he could but it just didn't make sense. My dad doesn't get cancer. He can't get cancer. He's freakin' 52 years old. No one asked me! OK, that's ok we'll beat it. Oh, yeah one other thing we have to tell you. Your dad is to weak to take chemo and if he did take it would kill him faster. Well the rest of that week just got worse... and again no one asked me! My dad didn't even make one week. He passed away that Saturday.

What Just Happened???

We are starting a new bible study series called "Live Like You Were Dying." Let me tell you this is going to be very hard for me. I now know what it is like to live like you are dying. I watched my dad do it right in front of me. He was so strong it was unbelievable. He made us laugh that whole week. He was a true hero to me. I seen him cry one time, I take that back he got tears in his eyes and he said what are you going to do, it is what it is and I know where I'm going. And the rest of that week he was so amazing. God had to be his strength. I pray for my family and friends sake I am as strong as he was. I know that is the only way I was able to keep anything together. My dad taught me so much when I was younger. You see he was not only my dad but he was my pastor for most of my life. He was not perfect and fell short of his own teachings sometimes but the message was there. He taught me what it was to be a man. He taught me to love a person for who they are, not what they are. He taught me that everyone needed Christ. Even the jerks. He taught me to love the stinky guy. He taught me, if you go for the biggest guy in the crowd then everyone else would follow. He taught me you have to show respect to get respect. He taught me never to give up. And in that last week of his life, he taught me what it means to face death. Dying is not the hard part, living is. You have to fight to live. Every day. You have to go after what ever it is you want. I think the scary part of dying is leaving your loved ones with the hurt of loosing someone. The fear of missing the people you love most.

And that my friend is why you have to make every moment count. Make a difference not only in your life but in the lives around you. I guess I have a new motto "No regrets." Tell the truth no matter what. If someone is lost, help them find their way. Love everyone. It's not about being selfish. Share. Life is short but eternity is forever. The past is just that. The present is right now. Plan for the future but don't get upset if it doesn't go as planned. God has something better. Pain does hurt but God is a pretty good pain reliever. Change, get over it, embrace it and make it happen. It's about making a difference! Change someones life and see what a blessing it is to your life. It's about growing. It's not all about you. This is some things that have been going though my head for some time now. Let me know what you think.

Love ya,
Kristian